May 2007 Email Page To a Friend
Career
6 Steps to Successful Habits
By Fred Dearborn
Personal habits control and create our actions at work, at home and in every other area of our lives. Powerful and effective people know this, and they take full advantage of it by consciously choosing their habits. They also know how to form habits which is the topic of this article.

Habit Forming
Creating a habit, whether it’s adding a good one or releasing a bad one, means being vigilant in order to overcome a lot of inertia. As anyone who’s gone on a diet knows those first couple of days are hard. But if you approach a habit with a sensible step-by-step plan (the secret of those powerful and effective people), your chances of success improve dramatically. Over the years, I’ve narrowed down this process to six steps. In fact, in my experience, it’s a process that will work every time if you use it.

Be specific about what habit you want to create or eliminate. The more detailed and concrete you are the more likely you are to succeed. One manager I know, named Kevin, was getting feedback that he was intimidating his co-workers. He decided to be friendlier at work. I asked him to get more specific. He did. He made the decision to smile at five people a day and to compliment five people a day. That kind of specificity provides two things: first, it closes the loopholes, and second, it makes it easy to track your success.

Commit to your habit. In other words, make a conscious and clear promise to follow through on your habit. This sounds like an obvious and easy step. However it is one that most of us will forget when it’s convenient or life gets challenging. So write it down, tell a friend, or just say it out loud to yourself. Use direct and powerful language. All too often we say things like, "I will try to get my paperwork done," or "I will do it if I have time." Indirect language gives us an out, and we often take it. Instead say something like "I will smile at five people today."

Practice your habit. Just do it. Take action. No habit was ever created or eliminated without getting off of the couch. Sounds basic, right? But "practice" implies something else that is very important. You can’t do it wrong when you’re practicing and that gives you the freedom to fail and then try again. "Practicing" takes the pressure off you and makes it easier to get started. Kevin has been practicing his smiles for over a year now. He still reports that sometimes he forgets, but his employees have recognized his efforts and have commented on how approachable he has become.

Track your habit. If you are clear about what habit you want to create or eliminate and all you do is track it then the habit will move in the direction you intend it to. The more detailed and accurate you are in your tracking the more powerfully it will influence your habit. If you choose not to track your habit you won’t know if you are being successful, and it will be easier to slack in your practice. You will also be very apt to think you are doing better than you actually are. Kevin chose to write it down in his daily planner every time he smiled at someone or gave someone a compliment. In our sessions he was able to tell me exactly how successful he had been. He also asked his employees, coworkers and supervisors to let him know how he was doing.

Celebrate your successes and your failures. Learning theory has demonstrated over and over that rewarding positive results rather than punishing mistakes changes behavior much faster. Notice your successes and make a big deal out of them. Congratulate yourself out loud, give yourself a gold star or tell someone about your success. If you want, reward yourself with a small gift. However when you do fail, celebrate your failures—that you tried—so you won’t be afraid to make them. Our failures give us information and help us improve. In one business I’ve worked with, they take five minutes at the beginning of every management meeting to admit their mistakes and they applaud each other. This has resulted in a level of innovation that is truly amazing; since no one is afraid to try something new.

Be Persistent. Just don’t quit. For over a year, I worked with one woman who wanted to work out at least three times a week even though she didn’t like to exercise. She kept tracking her goal by writing down her workouts on her calendar. Even when she would go off-track for weeks at a time she would record her progress. At times she was frustrated because she could clearly see that she wasn’t meeting her goal, but she never quit. Soon enough, she started exercising more regularly. Now she works out religiously, and tends to get uncomfortable when she misses her exercise. She succeeded because she followed the first five steps and then kept at it until her goal became a habit. This kind of persistence also paid off for Kevin. After practicing his smiles and compliments for three months he is easy to talk to, friendly and very approachable.
Learn to create the habits you want and you will create a winning life.

Career and life advisor Fred Dearborn is co-owner of The Coaching Biz and a consultant to 5 Essentials to a Winning Life.

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